Devils

Thank God for Duke. Even in a rare year like this one, when North Carolina kind of stinks, I have the familiar comfort of hating Duke. Of hating the pinched face of their coach. Of hating their sniveling, entitled, frat-boy players; the ones who will have to shave by the time they're 40, I'm sure. Of hating the quazi-Nazi rallies that take place in the stands of their little high school gym.

(Wait, I can't stay mad. CBS just alerted me that there's a player on Siena named Just-in'Love Smith. Wow.)